My thoughts exactly


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alp

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I used to think spanking was good for character formation. I remember my father holding a willow cane chasing my eldest sister along the fields in the dark and in the rain.. I really hated that. I also remember losing my school fee being whipped by my mum for losing it. And I remember queuing up to be caned for writing the wrong words in dictation in primary school. And I remember my crafty second sister holding onto our younger brother whenever she was about to be caned, knowing full well that my father would never cane her because of the BOY she was holding onto.

I think spanking or corporal punishment sometimes is uncalled for. I did resort to it, but only very rarely. I think children should be taught right from wrong from a very young age, but now they are corrupted by internet misinformation .. too young, too soon and too immature to handle information overload.

I think you mean proper parenting rather than physical spanking, @marlingardener , don't you think?
 
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I think it is so important that minor discipline like smacking is not legislated against; however smacking often creates fear whereas the spoken word or expression of disapproval is often far more effective. I dont like smacking, whether for children or pet dogs, at all and can never remember ever doing it
Trophies for just participating? No, not for me. How would young children know how good they are on the sports field or academically if their achievements are not recognised?
 

alp

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Yes, I know! How about those psychologists saying that using red pen to mark hurt children's self esteem. Deal with it...
 

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Hi,

What I see of many kids these days makes me think using a gag and tying them up until they are 18 would be a good thing. Kids completely out of control in stores whizzing around like lunatics diving into everything whilst their parent looks on adoringly; strange how many single parents there are these days many living on benefits; is it any wonder kids are turning out the way they do considering the role model they have to look up to; good practices should start at home and be built upon in school? I'm just old fashioned being brought up the hard way of getting an hiding if I did wrong and this even spilled over into my early apprenticeship years when I cheeked the engineers; unfortunately there is little deterrent at all these days; I've seen local court cases where on the 275th time in court the idiot judge gave yet another chance; I also think it wrong criminals hide behind the fact they have kids.

Sorry for the soap box but it's long overdue for someone to be in control at every level from top government down instead of being a set of wimps.

How about bank CEO's who receive huge cash bonuses for incompetency; I'd just sack them.

Kind regards, Colin.
 
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Yes, I do advocate proper parenting, and if done early and fairly well, spanking would be seldom if ever done.
"The look" is all I ever needed when dealing with children, either neighbor's children or the ones who visited the library. They were never quite sure what I'd do, and sure didn't want to find out!
It is such a disservice to a child to give no boundaries, not to follow up on promises, and to praise to the skies the smallest accomplishment. Give a child goals, not gold stars for showing up!
 
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There was a teacher in Edmonton that got fired for daring to give a grade of 0 to a student who didn't bother writing and handing in a required assignment. There was such outrage across the country at the school board, he was reinstated.

Kids today do feel entitled. At 16yrs of age (1883), my grandfather left the home farm in Manitoba and took possession of his own homestead. All alone with one horse team and a milk cow, he plowed up the virgin prairie and made a success of it. The first winter he survived on nothing but milk from his cow and turnips he had grown. I would think he'd have had enough of turnips after that but to his dying day(age 101), he had to have turnips served at all the family gatherings. Could todays 16 year olds do what my granddad did? I doubt it
They've been fed a constant diet of how special they are, so spoiled they walk down the streets with their pants hanging down screaming, "Big Bird says I'm SPECIAL!"
OK, that was a bit extreme.
 
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alp

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I have to say my parents were very nice. My father never drank or gambled and my mother was fast, hard working and was the main breadwinner. When I told her that my school asked me if I wanted to be exempted from paying school fee as a form of scholarship, my mother said no and that it should be left to someone less fortunate. And my parents got up every day at 5am to work the fields, sometimes in freezing cold weather.

I absolutely hate those with their pants half way down .. a la Justin Bieber .. Really was disgusting and I am glad the silly fad hasn't caught on.
 

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Sometimes when I watch children and young adults, I can't help but think:
:eek: "These are the people that will be in charge when I am old and vulnerable."


They don't get taught how to excel, or even try. They don't learn how to handle disappointment. They don't learn good sportsmanship. We have a generation of sore losers. They get trophies for merely showing up, teachers are told not to use red ink, or fired for giving a child a 0. Then the kids get to high school/college - and take guns to school when they get a bad grade or get bullied. :( Or they commit suicide. Some things in life hurt - they need to get used to it.


Parents seem to want to save them from all the childhood hurts, both mental and physical. I think this is a disservice to the children. At least in part, it's the pains of childhood that teach them to be an adult. How do you learn to pick yourself up if you have never fallen down?


Along with trophies and not using red ink, the parents seem to be trying to child-proof the world. Someone fell off the monkeys bars when they were a kid, legislature happens :rolleyes:, no more monkey bars. Too many kids got got smacked in the face with a tether-ball, no more tether-ball. We fell off the jungle gym and hurt ourselves, so no more jungle gyms. The concrete in the playground has been replaced with a spongy rubber to keep them from scraping a knee. :rolleyes: (They actually make swings with "seatbelts" so the kids can't jump off and hurt themselves.) Kids need to run and play and suffer small injuries! I think it's these little hurts in life that get you mentally ready for other pain. :confused: (How will they handle gall bladder surgery?! Probably with opioids :(.)

I remember hearing somewhere that the reason we teethe so young is because the pain is so intense, it would either kill an adult, or drive them mad. Babies have no frame of reference for pain, so they can handle it. They know it hurts, but not how much.


When their parents are not spoiling them rotten, they go totally the other way, and just ignore them. :( So involved with their phone that the child's head could be on fire, and they'd never notice.

And if the child is doing something dangerous, you can't say anything, or you get yelled at!! o_O "Gee, lady, I'm sorry I told your child to stay in the shopping cart. Please don't yell at me - I promise I will let the next child crack their head open. Is that better?" :rolleyes: :whistle:
 

alp

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Sometimes when I watch children and young adults, I can't help but think:
:eek: "These are the people that will be in charge when I am old and vulnerable."


They don't get taught how to excel, or even try. They don't learn how to handle disappointment. They don't learn good sportsmanship. We have a generation of sore losers. They get trophies for merely showing up, teachers are told not to use red ink, or fired for giving a child a 0. Then the kids get to high school/college - and take guns to school when they get a bad grade or get bullied. :( Or they commit suicide. Some things in life hurt - they need to get used to it.


Parents seem to want to save them from all the childhood hurts, both mental and physical. I think this is a disservice to the children. At least in part, it's the pains of childhood that teach them to be an adult. How do you learn to pick yourself up if you have never fallen down?


Along with trophies and not using red ink, the parents seem to be trying to child-proof the world. Someone fell off the monkeys bars when they were a kid, legislature happens :rolleyes:, no more monkey bars. Too many kids got got smacked in the face with a tether-ball, no more tether-ball. We fell off the jungle gym and hurt ourselves, so no more jungle gyms. The concrete in the playground has been replaced with a spongy rubber to keep them from scraping a knee. :rolleyes: (They actually make swings with "seatbelts" so the kids can't jump off and hurt themselves.) Kids need to run and play and suffer small injuries! I think it's these little hurts in life that get you mentally ready for other pain. :confused: (How will they handle gall bladder surgery?! Probably with opioids :(.)

I remember hearing somewhere that the reason we teethe so young is because the pain is so intense, it would either kill an adult, or drive them mad. Babies have no frame of reference for pain, so they can handle it. They know it hurts, but not how much.


When their parents are not spoiling them rotten, they go totally the other way, and just ignore them. :( So involved with their phone that the child's head could be on fire, and they'd never notice.

And if the child is doing something dangerous, you can't say anything, or you get yelled at!! o_O "Gee, lady, I'm sorry I told your child to stay in the shopping cart. Please don't yell at me - I promise I will let the next child crack their head open. Is that better?" :rolleyes: :whistle:
My thought exactly!
 
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Colin

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Hi,

Well said MaryMary; you're not contrary you're bang on. (y)

I believe a suit of armour has to worn these days by kids wishing to play conkers and the suit of armour has to have passed dozens of safety checks being issued with all the relevent certificates; what happened to kids building tree dens and swinging on rope over a local pond; the only chips we had as kids came from potatoes; chips these days are in every must have electronic gadget.

Bullying at school was ever present when I was a kid 60 years ago; I used to be a target for the school bully because I was such a skinny weak kid suffering from severe asthma; one of my school chums called Dennis committed suicide because of constant bullying due to his bad stammer; in those days long ago food and clothes were luxuries but I can bang on about how tough it was because modern kids have never gone through what my generation went through.

I've climbed big trees and fallen off cycles whilst learning to ride but I survived and now at 70 still climb big trees unafraid of anything; I cringe when I'm told to be careful because it makes me feel unsafe as do machines covered in guards and splattered with safety warnings; I was taught the dangers of machinery from the age of 15 in the pit where I worked inches away from machines with gear diameters taller than my height; it was explained to me if I poke a finger into a moving machine then I would lose my finger and the machines I worked on wouldn't stop at a finger they could and would drag me in killing me. I'm now a dinosaur brought up and taught the old way at least we kids left school being able to spell and add up also we could communicate with each other without a single word of foul language; many things have changed for the better but unfortunately the old standards of politeness and courtesy appear long gone. :(

Kind regards, Colin.
 
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I can't quite agree with the spanking part and think education is a better option, so i don't relate so much. We need good parents who teach by example and not by preaching or hitting. Unfortunately the parents are the problem. I am frequently horrified by how child-like many parents are and what a poor example they provide their children who are going to grow up, in many cases, just like the parents. There is too much dumb hating by parents, what can we expect of the off-spring?
 
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Colin

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Hi,

It's possible the parents deserve a good spanking not the kids? Kids can't choose which family they are born into and many get off to an incredibly bad start especially those born to druggies and alcoholics; what chance have they in life destined for menial jobs.

Years ago Bron and I adopted a ginger tom cat from the "Cats protection league". He was called Cola and had been rescued from a local canal by firemen; Cola had suffered his tail being chopped off by low life who then tried to drown him and it's not surprising he was vicious.

Back home Bron and I made Cola most welcome but Bron daren't go near him and whenever I went near or tried to handle him he would lash out for all he was worth and I suffered many deep scratches; one day after yet another serious attack from Cola I gave him two sound slaps hard enough for him to take notice but not so hard as to hurt him; from then on we became the best of friends and I could do absolutely anything with him; whilst I was watching TV Cola would climb onto my chest for some TLC and on one occasion he bit my chin when he became over excited; Bron was always wary of Cola but when Cola became ill and we had to have him put to sleep; the day before he climbed onto Bron purring his head off; we'll never forget this and we'll never forget Cola whom we loved to bits. :)

Kind regards, Colin.
 

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